A short description of my path

It is generally accepted that therapists should be careful about self-disclosure, the idea being that therapy should not be about the therapist. That said, a strong therapeutic alliance between therapist and client is essential to successful therapy--"fit" matters. So I offer this short summary of my background and path to becoming a therapist. 

Growing up in Seattle in the 1970s and 80s, my challenges included the divorce of my parents when I was young, a lack of contact with my father, a strained relationship with my step father, and my eventual resort to drugs and alcohol for relief. I lost my mother to cancer when I was 25. At the same time, I developed a strong curiosity about the world, a love of learning, and a connection with the outdoors through skiing, backpacking, bicycle touring, and SCUBA diving.

I graduated from college with the intention of being a writer. Several years later, I went to law school at the University of Michigan. Within a few years of graduating, I had married, and our first child was born; our second child was born a few years later. 

I trace my path to becoming a therapist to mid-life. I was the sole income-earner for our family. I felt stretched thin between trying to be a good father and husband and succeeding in a demanding, stressful law-firm environment as a litigator. Increasingly, I used alcohol as a coping mechanism. I grew more dissatisfied in my work. Things were not working. 

Looking for relief, I stumbled across Buddhism in 2007 and began a spiritual practice in earnest. A few years later I stopped drinking. I also started distance running, eventually ultramarathons. 

With the clarity that resulted, the value that I placed on connection, empathy, and meaning began to overshadow those emphasized in the legal profession and modern American culture, such as competition and material gain. This led me to volunteer work in hospice and palliative care, where I found deep fulfillment in offering a therapeutic presence to another person. I also began working with a talented therapist as a client. These experiences solidified my intention to become a therapist. 

I matriculated at Antioch University's master's program in clinical mental health counseling in 2017. In order to continue working full-time to support my family, I took my time in school. By the time I graduated, my wife and I had ended our 20-year marriage, each of my children had gone off to college, and I had lost my younger brother to alcoholism. 

Today I continue to practice law part-time, focusing on collaborative divorce and mediation. I continue to practice and study Buddhism. I am passionate about ultra-running and have completed multiple 100-mile events. I am an engaged father to two wonderful young adults. And I have found meaningful and deeply satisfying work as a therapist.